


Red vs Blue; "Dear Chairmen,"

by insomniacOlympian



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Agent Washington (Red vs. Blue) Has PTSD, Agent Washington (Red vs. Blue) needs a hug, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Artificial Intelligence, Big Sisters, Blood Gulch Chronicles, Bromance, Brother Feels, Brother-Sister Relationships, Brotherhood, Brotherly Affection, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Chorus Trilogy (Red vs. Blue), Church Isn't an AI, Community: rvb_slash, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fix-It, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Inspired by Ghost in the Shell, Leonard L. Church Being an Asshole, M/M, Other, Post-Canon Fix-It, Post-Project Freelancer, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Project Freelancer, Red vs. Blue References, Romance, RvB Angst War, RvB Platonic Week, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:34:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27494317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insomniacOlympian/pseuds/insomniacOlympian
Summary: Took a look at RvB Season 13's ending & my brain jumped on the phrase "I'm leaving this message - as well as others." in Church's final speech. Each chapter will be one of Epsilons messages to individual Reds & Blues, recorded right after his Group Message before he defragments & in the order I think he'd record them.Chapter 1 starting with his message to Tucker. This is post Season 13, maybe while the Sim Troopers are on their vacation. I won't spoil my own fic but this is a Fix Fic where I rewrote canon a little bit but in a way that could be believable if you squinted.
Relationships: AI Program Epsilon | Leonard Church/Agent Texas | AI Program Beta, Allison Prime/The Director | Dr. Leonard Church, Leonard L. Church & Agent Texas | Allison, Leonard L. Church & Lavernius Tucker, Leonard L. Church | AI Program Alpha & Lavernius Tucker, Leonard L. Church | AI Program Alpha/Agent Texas | AI Program Beta, Leonard L. Church | AI Program Alpha/Other(s), Leonard L. Church/Agent Texas | Allison, Leonard L. Church/Agent Washington, Leonard L. Church/Lavernius Tucker
Kudos: 15





	Red vs Blue; "Dear Chairmen,"

**Author's Note:**

> "Hey. Where were you from before all of this shit anyway, man?"
> 
> "Sidewinder, remember? Or. You know. A storage facility. Actually.."
> 
> "No, no. I mean. Yes. Exactly! I can't say "before you joined the UNSC" anymore, so. Don't you remember where the Director lived before he started Freelancer and The Sim Bases?"
> 
> "Oh! Yeah.. damn, that's a good question. I think I do, actually? He was from Texas. Him and Allison."
> 
> "Well, that explains that. Do you remember what city?"
> 
> "Austin."
> 
> "Ha ha, nice. Of course."
> 
> "Yeah.. how about you, Tucker?"
> 
> "Me? I'm from Louisiana, dude."
> 
> "Oh, come on! What city were you from, though?"
> 
> "... New Orleans."
> 
> "Surprising no one."
> 
> "Up yours."
> 
> "I'm just saying!" 
> 
> "I know but it's still a good city. Plus, I grew up there, Church. Fuck, honestly? I practically grew up IN Youth Events and I don't regret a thing."
> 
> "So that's where you learned to dance."
> 
> "Ahuh."
> 
> "Probably grew up in all of those band, concert and music events too, I'm sure."
> 
> "Honestly? .. Yeah. Ah.. shitty bars."
> 
> "Nice clubs, too?"
> 
> "And raves."
> 
> ".. dance halls?" 
> 
> "Yup."
> 
> "Man, all of that has you written all over it. You're making a lot more sense, now."
> 
> "Like how someone who was a dork like you are - no offense - before he turned evil. And someone like a nice version of Texas would be all about everything to do with a city like Austin?"
> 
> "Yeah, pretty much. .. he wasn't a TOTAL dork, though. Him and Allison actually met at a bar that was PRETTY legit, I'm not gonna lie."
> 
> "Huh. Really?"
> 
> "Yeah."
> 
> "..." "..."

"Hey, Tucker. 

If you're alive to hear this? I'm sorry, dude. I really, REALLY.. actually am sorry, that I had to do what I did. Even if it got you and everyone else through Hargroves shitheels, I know you'll be pissed about the way it was done and I really can't blame you since, y'know. 

All of you probably thought I was there the whole time for it and just keeping my mouth shut, for once. 

You must have thought that. 

Like I said in the Group Message though - and GODDAMN I can't believe I just said "if you're alive" to you when I already said "if you're all hearing this!" Ugh. Whatever - like I said. 

I did it because I didn't just think. I knew. I was. Fuck, man. I AM coming apart and fragmenting, just like the Alpha did to make me? 

That was.. the only way for me to power The Meta.. fucks sake. For me to power Maines suit, for you. 

It IS and.. by the time you hear this? Literally the only solution I could both think of and had the strength for. 

It's been tough enough to help Carolina run hers lately, let alone some jumped up fucking, Charon Industries upgraded one man suit of death armor. 

I wasn't kidding about my memories weighing me down and I don't just mean the good ones I've had with all of you. 

Or the incredibly shitty ones that we got through together, either. 

I'll get to that in a second. 

The real point is, obviously this is one of those "other" messages.. and since I told everyone the how & the why and you, the who & the what? 

There's some other things that I owe telling you. 

I've wanted to die for as long as I've existed, man. That's not why I did this. I meant that it was the only solution I could think of, but.. I don't just have Alpha. The real Churches. "Your" Churches memories. Up to the point I was split off from him and.. all of ours, since Caboose repaired me. 

There's other ones, too. 

You already know that I have a lot of the Directors memories too but I don't mean those. 

Whatever. Honestly? remember how badly I fucked Wash up when I was in him, too. 

.. Feel free to pause so that you can laugh. 

Anyway. 

Wash is kind of why I have more to tell you than I do some of the others because the two of us have been friends for longer and you deserve the truth. 

The truth is, when Wash took Church into the Freelancer base where they kept me, while you were in the desert? 

Alpha believed him, about being an A.I. Not a ghost. 

You know he wasn't that stupid and I know that you know that he wasn't that stupid because.. 

Goddamn. 

When Alpha jumped into the Metas head, having all of those other fragments reabsorbed into one being, it.. 

It gave them and him the strength to figure out how to transmit himself right into the fucked up parts of Wash's head to avoid the EMP. 

To not just believe he was an A.I. but remember it. 

He did that just like how the Director put him into poor Jimmys wiped brain & sent him to Blood Gulch, except he didn't have to override an empty brain. 

He just hitched a ride in a full one. 

Like how him & O'Malley used to possess people, too. 

Tucker, I'm Church. Your Church. Blood Gulches. 

And yeah, I'm Epsilon too. 

The A.I. who fucked Wash up for life and caused shit for everyone but.. Epsilon has been Church. "The Alpha." El

Ever since the first time that Wash got close enough to that stupid floating ball for me and the other fragments to jump into it. 

It just took a lot of time to remember both sets of memories. Eachvand every fragments memories, actually. 

I bet you're beyond pissed at me, Tucker. I'd be if I were you. 

I know I left you guys to go with Carolina and that must have hurt even worse than it would because I was just a copy of your friend more then the real deal and I leave you like it's nothing and now you know that it really was me but I had. 

A really. Really good fucking reason to lie to you and to everyone!

I did not want to fuck with Cabooses head anymore then I already did. Then both of us already have. 

All three of us know what it's like to have someone make you doubt your reality and I couldn't do that to the fucking kid. He's too good for that. 

That's why I lied about being Epsilon, once I remembered I was Church and.. 

I think you can connect the dots from there and figure out why I went with Carolina so quick but I'm just going to say it since this is my only chance. 

I had to fix my families mistakes. 

My fathers, or.. creators? I guess? 

That chick has kind of been like my sister and she feels like an older one but.. sometimes I catch myself thinking like she's MY daughter and it made me want to kill him so fucking badly for what he did to both of us, Tucker. 

For what he did to the fragments. The Freelancers and all of us and ALL of the Sim Troopers, even those Zealot assholes. 

I've been waiting for the chance to tell you all of this since I recombined, so. 

You were the first friend I'd had since I'd last seen Beta. Hell, since Leonard had last seen Allison before that. 

You were my best friend until me and Tex met again and I started remembering who I was and GODDAMN, do I sound like Caboose right now but I don't care. 

You were still my best friend after that, too. 

I love you, man. 

I don't think I could have gotten here without either of you and I want to say one last thing before I record the rest of these. 

If Memory is the Key & your Sword "was The Key" for a fake prophecy & it's A Key for those Aliens ancestors to find a "true warrior?"

And all of what we've been through was because that douchebag wanted to find a way to help people fight them better and just ended up chasing his wife's ghost, instead? 

Treating her and his own ghost like shit? 

I think you're the truest warrior to come out of all of this. Not Tex. Not Wash or Carolina and not me. 

And maybe that was Destiny. Maybe that's why we were all here for this mess, so a hero could rise out of it. 

Fuck what I said to everyone, Tucker. 

Fuck belief and fuck faith, too. 

I HOPE that's true and either way, with dying to save all of your sorry asses for however YOU want to take this shit and everything else that will come afterwards, dude? 

I just hope that it is because honestly, you're a born leader and a better one then me and you're one of the three best friends I've ever had. 

.. Even if you're a pervert. I can't really judge. So. 

Whatever's left in me of him.. from me,

The Director of Project Freelancer, ~ Dr. Leonard Church. ~ 

Rot in pieces. 

From The Alpha & Pvt. Jimmy.

Epsilon. 

Church. 

To you, man. My fucking counselor whose spot checked me and everyone else, every time any of us has needed it when no one else would. 

And like no one did with the Director. 

I complained about it all of the time but I barely ever actually cared. 

Thank you for everything. 

And I'm sorry for Dad and I'm sorry that I couldn't figure out another way to try and fix this mess. 

Son of a bitch, right?

**Author's Note:**

> https://youtu.be/d370CKlg-wk


End file.
